Kale... smoothie?

In the continued effort to find flavorful beverages to mix the death that is known as protein into, I opted to attempt a kale smoothie (highly recommended by a friend of mine). Unfortunately, her recipe was lacking information and portion suggestions. Instead of looking up a recipe online (which is something a normal person would do when making something for the first time) I decided to wing it; see where my Ninja took me. 

It took me someplace dark. Evil. Awful. I never want to go back there. Please don't make me go back there. 

First of all, I was expecting my smoothie to look green and healthy and beautiful; it was supposed to look amazing, much like the picture above. Instead... it looked suspicious, purplish, bubbly, and frightening. Nothing about this concoction looked beautiful or healthy. And against my better judgment, I tasted it instead of just pouring it down the drain. Worst decision ever. It tasted leafy and grass life. It tasted like it should have been green. I wanted a green drink that didn't taste green but instead got a purplish drink that tasted like dirt.

The remainder of the kale was thrown out, which might have been a little rash because I'm looking at a recipe right now that looks like it wouldn't taste bark like, especially since this mixture calls for coconut milk. It is at the top of the trash though, so I suppose I could just pull it out and put it back in the fridge. No one would know. Well, you would I guess, assuming that someone is reading this. 

...no one's reading this.

No - I will not be removing food from the trash. I've reached some weird lows a few weeks ago, I will not be taking a trip down memory lane.

Starting weight: 273.4

Last weight in: 247.5

Height: 5'7"

Surgeon's goal: 180

Personal goal: 160